Rebecca Weller

My name is Rebecca Weller. I am an NCTJ qualified Freelance Journalist with experience in online, print and radio journalism for a variety of publications including HuffPost UK, BBC, The Brighton Argus, The West Sussex County Times, Brighton Fringe Festival and BN1 Magazine.

Kind-hearted Cowfold children help bring Christmas cheer to Henfield care home residents

To celebrate the festive period, Country Mice Nursery staff and children have started a class project to help combat loneliness in their community during the Covid 19 pandemic, and will be sending cards, decorations and pictures to Red Oaks Care Home. Nursery manager Kerry Bentley said: “We have been talking to the children about helping people and how lots of people may not be able to see their family at the moment due to the virus. “We have spoken about how some of the people in the home may

Sex After Childbirth Takes Time – But I’ve Learned It’s More Than Worth The Wait

I worried we’d never get our groove back, but after going through labour I feel like I trust my body more, and have more confidence to try new things with it, writes Rebecca Weller. By Rebecca Weller 13/03/2020 06:00am GMT Sex may not be the most important part of a relationship, but intimacy and connecting with each other really is. There’s no better way to feel that closeness with your partner. That said, the idea of having sex after giving birth was enough to make me want to tighten the lock on my chastity belt and throw away the key (a feeling in which I’m sure I’m not alone). Even though I felt mentally ready to have sex again quite quickly after, the reality was my body just was not on the same page. My labor did go somewhat smoothly, and was quicker than I expected. However, I found out the hard way it’s not just the perineum that can tear during labor: I had torn quite badly upwards, which required some thirty to forty stitches in and around my vagina, and having my urethra and clitoris stitched back together with no pain relief. The recommended time to wait to have sex again after labor is six weeks but, for me, it just felt such a long time – I craved that feeling of closeness between my husband and myself again. I had been hoping for a ‘no stitches and out of hospital quick’ kind of birth if nothing else so we could solve our sexual frustration faster, but this was not meant to be. The exhaustion from caring for a newborn plus the hormonal changes raging through me meant I couldn’t even hold a proper conversation with my equally exhausted husband, let alone a sexual extravaganza. Having a newborn was such a special time, of course, but our days faded into one big blur. I think I, like a lot of women, lost a bit of myself in the time warp, especially as our daughter suffered from severe reflux and I struggled with breastfeeding. Eventually we settled into our new routine and started to feel a bit more like our old selves as we emerged from the newborn fog. And on emerging one of the first things on my mind was when we would be ready to have sex again. After being home from hospital for a few days, every time I saw my husband I had this rush of sexual excitement... followed shortly after by a painful twinge down below to assure me the time was not yet right. By the recommended six weeks postpartum, I was worried we would never be able to get our groove back. We started off trying to be intimate with each other without actually having full sex at first: kissing, touching and just generally spending time together as a couple and experiencing a separate emotion from parenting. We ended up waiting until around three months postpartum to actually have full sex again. My body just was not ready until then, and I have to say it felt completely different to pre-baby sex. The first time was a little awkward. I was so nervous about it hurting (almost like losing my virginity again), and my husband was conscious of my scars and the tightness I still felt. I did experience some pain and discomfort at first but after I relaxed, that eased off. After the first few times, that anxiety disappeared completely. In its place, the closeness and bond we had felt before becoming parents became stronger than ever. I had a newfound respect for my body, which made sex even more enjoyable on so many different levels – I even found my orgasms and every touch more intense. I realised my sexual preferences had changed as well. Pre-birth I was somewhat conservative when it came to trying new things in the bedroom. I knew what I liked, and I knew what my husband liked, so why fix something that isn’t broken? But after going through childbirth I feel like I trust my body more, and have more confidence with it, which has made me much more eager to try new things and, if anything, has actually boosted my sex drive. Knowing too that my husband has seen an actual human head come out of there (and all the things that follow) but still wants to have sex with me takes away any worries of embarrassment. No lack of shaving or anything else can be as bad as that, right? However, while our sex life is great – in some ways better than pre-birth – we do have to work harder to make time for each other, which can mean sex is sometimes the last thing on our minds. We think it’s important for us to try different things to keep our spark alive. But after almost seven years together, two years of marriage, one toddler, , career changes and everything else that comes with such a partnership, I have never been more sure of anything as I am that my husband and I will continue to have a great sex life, and always have the strongest of bonds with the most loyal love for each other. As we know, sex is the one of the best way to communicate those feelings. And while it takes time to get there through the wilderness of postpartum, it will happen. And when it does, I promise you it is so worth the wait.

Cirque Berserk review | BN1

Death defying stunts, impressive pyrotechnics and breathtaking acrobatics; Cirque Berserk is a ninety minute adrenaline and emotional filled roller coaster from start to finish. Watching the performers make human pyramids, throwing flame-covered knives and swinging through the air by the neck look as seamless and as fun as the simplest daily task was spell binding. Captivation, anticipation and thrill tingled through me, making me unable to look away and keeping my jaw wide open throughout the

Grassroots charity CEO urges us to talk about suicide to save lives | BN1

As Brighton based suicide prevention charity, Grassroots, prepare for their World Suicide Prevention Day (an international effort to prevent suicide; WSPD) event at the Hope and Ruin on September 10, BN1 spoke to CEO Stella Comber about how we can all participate in preventing suicide within our everyday lives. Stella explained this year’s theme for WSPD is working together, she said: “It is an opportunity for everybody across the globe to come together to focus on this tragic issue and to come

Do you feed Brighton’s seagulls? | BN1

A charity documentary photographer is calling for people to take part in her project and be photographed feeding Brighton’s seagulls. Gemma Taylor, 40, from Brighton, decided to start the project in 2017 and developed it as a series this year. She said: “I remember reading years ago – in The Argus – about a family who nursed a baby seagull that had crash-landed in their garden back to health, and how each year the bird would return to visit them. It was then about 15 years later, when I found o

BN1 chats to... Doves | BN1

It is clear he feels blessed fans have stuck by Doves and there is still a desire for them to continue touring, calling the reaction to their comeback staggering and incredible. Williams says working hard is crucial to succeeding in the music industry but having fun is always the aim. However, he explains this is not the case for aspiring bands and artists. As the industry gets tougher and the route of labels developing bands over several years diminishes, a lot of people don’t get a second chan

My Greatest Period Ever Interview | Brighton Fringe

As the Traditional Native American saying goes: "At a woman's first bleeding, she meets her power. In her bleeding years, she practices it. At menopause, she becomes it." Award winning folk musician, comedian and sex education teacher Lucy Peach brings her period power crusade to Brighton. Together with her husband, cartoonist Richard Berney, Lucy illustrates her menstrual cycle through music and comedy to show the world that a woman's monthly bleed is not a curse but a blessing. The inspirat